Lateshoes

Resolutions Twenty Diggity-leven

1. Watch as many seasons of Dallas as possible. This clip should explain why.

2. Set some boundaries at work. 2010 was a bit of a whirlwind of opportunities (on one hand) and shit sandwich (on the other). I take pride in my work and in doing a good job, but last year I took it too far – working too many late nights and vacations, for pretty much nothing in return. Extra work/ stress without compensation will not be happening in 2011. Any catalog/ website emergencies not occurring Monday – Friday between 9am and 5pm will be deferred to the, “I’m sorry, I’m watching Dallas right now” department.

3. Hobble a good sewing-type person (i.e. Misery) until they agree to make or help me make a chubby girl replica of a 1950s/60s chiffon party dress to wear to Tawnya’s wedding.

Seriously. I needs it.

4. #3 brings me to #4 – Work on the chub and by that I mean – make healthier eating choices, drink more water and exercise. An extra bonus would be not feeling like a fatso whale at Tawnya’s wedding, but I mean – I’m doing it for my health and stuff. No really. I’m not going to put a number on it, but I would like to lose some amount of “the weight” and see what that’s like for a bit. There~ I said it. Are you happy now?

5. Spend an afternoon or evening or whatever replicating the Black Swan makeup.I may also need to make a crown.

6. Fucking curse less. This one is going to be more difficult than hobbling someone.

7. Finally get around to remodeling our two back bedrooms…maybe in the summer. The middle room at least shouldn’t be terrible – just floors and paint, but the back room is making me feel queasy. It was a late addition to the house and I’m pretty sure it was built out of popsicle sticks and spit balls.

8. Spend more time this year developing my visual arts skills; painting, digital design work etc…

9. Play music again.

10. Go on a real, non-stressful, lay about next to water drinking margaritas type vacation with Lars.

I’ve never been very good at experiencing my own pain. When I was younger my optimism was uncontainable to the point of embarrassment; despite having a childhood riddled with very real and very fucked up events. I’d say (without getting too specific) that in my youth I experienced at least 2 or 3 major Lifetime Movie genre staples -  experiences that should or could have broken me or maybe turned me into a homicidal nymphomaniac with multiple personality disorder.

For the more high-brow, I’d say I rank about a 5 on the Toni Morrison, Dorothy Allison Abuse and Abandonment O’meter (TM).

Over the years I’ve dealt with my shit, mostly through avoidance and the distinct understanding that I’m not alone or special in feeling wronged, pained, angry, sad, hurt…whatever.

This coping technique has served me well and made me, I think much more empathetic than most. I value that I haven’t let past wrongs keep me down. I feel brave and strong for moving on.

BUT – sometimes sucky things happen that I’m not prepared to deal with or psychologically analyze. Sometimes things happen and all I can do is wallow.

Luckily for my loved ones, I do my best wallowing alone, during insomniac hours like now when I can’t seem to just close the damn laptop and STOP THINKING.

During the day I’m totally fine. I can laugh and joke and plan and work and stress about work. When early evening hits I can play with my dogs, cook dinner, laugh and talk with Lars and watch t.v. I can be happy. But, when it’s time to put my head on the pillow every shitty thought, every insecurity, every worry comes spilling out and I just can’t make it stop until I’m so exhausted that my eyes collapse shut.

It sucks and it’s been happening for a little over a month now. Part of me wants to go all Judy Garland and start chugging Tylenol PMs like NERDS….mmmmm NERDS.

I think for now I’ll just listen to E.L.O. instead, because who the fuck can be sad listening to Telephone Line?

or looking at Jeff Lynn’s get up?

I’m having a hard time getting back into the swing of writing, but since deciding I don’t get paid enough to spend every waking moment of my day obsessing over my current project at work – I figure I better get back to some of the things I actually love.

So, I got thinking. What do I love right now? Well, oh so many things, dear reader(s). Let me tell you.

1. Wake up and get real with Justine Bateman & Kelly Cutrone

Kick ass. Kick ass. Kick ass. I’m thinking of copying this format – how grossed out would you be if I made some vlogs?

2. Makeup tutorials by Pixiwoo

Two gorgeous English sisters and professional make-up artists who taught me how to master the illusive “winged-eye.” They have lots of basic tutorials as well as super-cool, arty, high-concept stuff and celebrity copycat tricks a’la Edie Sedgwick and Marla Singer from Fight Club. Sigh. Love.

3. Treme – David Simon’s new show on HBO set in post-Katrina New Orleans. At first, I honestly wasn’t sure what I thought. There are a million characters and lots of great music, but the plot is so organic and subtle, it was slightly hard to engage at first. But, the beauty of Simon’s storytelling style is that he really allows you to get to know and love each character and the plot just sort of unfolds without you even noticing. I’ve said this about The Wire and Homicide – but, watching Treme is like literature for your television. Uh-mazing.

4. Grits. Cheese Grits. Jalepeno Cheese Grits.

Preferably served with fried okra or fried green tomatoes.

5. Suave’s Aveda rip off shampoo. Hello, lover. I’ve been spending 40 bucks on shampoo for the past 3 years and then suddenly you come along and I can spend $4!!! I was sure it would suck, but it totally doesn’t. Woo to the hoo for thriftin’ n’ shit.

6. Travel. Even though all of my work-related trips were exhausting, I’m completely excited about keeping up the jet-setting ways. Current trips in the works:

*Disneyland road trip with Shannon and her mama in October.

*D.C. and Baltimore with Lars, Tawnya, Angie & Greg to visit Jimi & Karin for Thanksgiving.

*Hopefully Boston and maybe Chicago again for work.

7. Singing in the shower. I’ve finally stuck our superfluous iPod in the bathroom and have been giving concerts to my toilet for the last few weeks. I do a really mean rendition of Elvis Costello’s Just About Glad.

Well, I’m just about glad that I knew you once, it was more than just a passing acquaintance | Well, I’m just about glad it was a memory that doesn’t need constant maintenance |  There are a few things that I regret, but nothing that I need to forget  | I’m the greatest lover that you never had, I’m just about glad…..

8. Painting. Mostly I’m just loving that in my head right now. But, when i get back to it, I’ll share some stuff.

9. Not getting cancer because I’ve got allergies up the pooper. Not literal allergies in my pooper, but you know? up the ying-yang, the wazoo, etc…

10. Fantasizing about not being in debt. Siiiiiiiighhhhh…. it’s like the emotional, grown up version of sticking your fingers in your ears and singing, “la la la la la la la la” really loud.

* A really rich and lovely couple take an interest in me and decide I can’t possibly live happily with all these student loans and house payments and gift me 200 grand.

* Someone reads the parts of this blog that were actually noteworthy and gives me a book deal.

* Someone sees one of my abstract paintings and decides that I’m the next Rothko or Pollock and pays up the already noted wazoo and I’m commissioned by rich benefactors everywhere.

*I find a briefcase full of money. This one is risky because I’ve seen enough movies to know there are always strings attached to such finds. See A Simple Plan.

* Nicholas Cage meets me and decides he wants to split his lottery winnings with me. See It Could Happen to You.

It could happen….. to ME.

I am so in love with Chicago.

I spent 4 wonderfully hurried nights, wandering its streets, exploring its landscape and loving it like a person. The buildings, the art, the train, the music, the people – all make my heart burst just a little bit.

All pictures were taken with my iPhone, Peggy. *Click on “Show Info” to see my captions and comments.

Chicago’s public restrooms are obsessed with robot toilets.

Inside the Amazing Chicago Funhouse

I’m completely in love with the “L.” The obnoxious voice you here can be seen in the slideshow above. He’s the guy wearing sunglasses on the train…at night.

Outside of the Art Institute of Chicago.

I just bought my domain and am building my own website from scratch!
It’s kind of freaking me out.
It will be a while before I move the blog, because I want to test the whole “having my own databases and server space” thing for a bit before diving completely in with (holy shit! 5 years of blog posts).
I’m also going to try creating Honeycakes there – though, one roadblock already; honeycakes.com is already taken by some wack ads page. Boo and hiss.
MySQL is scary.
PHP is scary.
I’m scared.

In other scary tech news – We got Lars a cheapy, cheapo netbook to take to India. We were both feeling a certain amount of stress about taking his heavy (and pricey) Macbook, so getting an extremely cheap (have I conveyed how cheap it was yet?) little (and I mean really little) pc seemed like the way to go.
The only real problem – frakking Windows. I totally understand that I’m Mac nerd/ snob…whatever, but you guys – Macs are just sooooooooooo much easier to use. AND they never get viruses. Anyway – after two days of dealing with Windows (ugh – the hair pulling) – we decided to install Linux. More specifically Ubuntu remix for Netbooks.
We installed last night (very easy) and according to Lars there are only a few glitches. Luckily I work with an Ubuntu guru who knows exactly what to do. (Only one of the perks of working in IT)
It’s a brave new tech-nerd world for the Medleys this week.
Now if I could only break out of my Spring Fever crazies.
At least I can take my laptop outside.

Because I’m so very sorry, for being so very remiss in my blogging duties. Again.

Crazy in love (Beyonce cover) – Antony & the Johnsons

I’m on Fire (Bruce Springsteen cover) – Bat for Lashes

Heroes (David Bowie cover) – Magnetic Fields

Toxic (Britney cover) – Mark Ronson featuring Ol’ Dirty Bastard & Tiggers

Kookies (sample of “Funky Chimes” from Sesame Street) – MF Doom

Everyday is like Sunday (Morrissey cover) – Colin Meloy

Human Behavior (Bjork cover) – The Decemberists

If this is it (Huey Lewis & the News cover) – Throw me the Statue

The Biggest Lie (Elliott Smith cover) – Dolorean

Where is my mind? (Pixies cover) – Emmy the Great

The Book of Love (Magnetic Fields cover) – Rose Polenzani & Rose Cousins

You can call me Al (Paul Simon cover) – Jens Lekman

The Origin of Love (Hedwig cover) – Rufus Wainwright

Instant Karma (John Lennon cover) – Of Montreal

Don’t Mess With Texas … Get Rid Of It : NPR.

Ha! I laughed because I’m a “libnut.” Ohhh, remember the good ol’ days when they got to scream “Love it or Leave it!” to us?

Suck it, extremist douchebags. Your time of bending over and taking a joke has come.

So, the tentative plan is that Angie and I are going to try to share a storefront on Etsy. We haven’t worked out all of the details, but look forward to telling all your friends about Honeycakes – which is what we’ve decided to call our store.

It’s the name of a Chubby Bunny song written for Tawnya’s dad’s wedding and I think it has just enough adorableness to be appealing, but not make people puke.

Angie will most likely be selling her AMAZING handmade bags and if we’re lucky…her clothing designs and earrings as well.

I’ll be doing graphic design work (web stuff, print stuff, branding etc…) as well as selling some of my goofy original artwork. Yarrrrr!

2HB – Roxy Music

kids don’t know shit – Islands

Ceremony – New Order

I was born (a unicorn) – The Unicorns

Money babies – The Dears

We are all made of stone – Dance Yourself to Death

Valerie Plame – The Decemberists

20th Century Boy – T Rex

Handle With Care – Jenny Lewis & The Watson Twins

Carol Brown – Flight of the Conchords

The Transfiguration – Sufjan Stevens

Nothing to fear – White Shoes and the Couples Company

Shit, damn, motherfucker – D’Angelo

Up the Down Escalator – The Chameleons

Bull in the heather (Sonic Youth cover) – The Go! Team

I don’t mind – Slumber Party

Bea, you were my first feminist icon! You will be missed.