Isn’t my Macbook ironic?
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Maybe it’s hormones or maybe it’s the fact that the sky has been pissing snow on my head for like, I don’t know 6 million days…or maybe the piss-snow has acid in it that’s rotting my brain – whatever the cause – I am really and truly in a state of utter bat-shit right now. [...]
Some things you totally wanted to know about me
4 things that I am passionate about: 1. “Sticking it” to “the man” 2. making my house a “home” 3. my family- and yes, this includes my animals 4. exploring, expressing – being creative *bonus* 5. Getting a haircut!! 4 things I want to do before I die: 1. Have a cool kid, raise it [...]
“I need him alive.”
Let me ask you something? When George Lucas changed history and gave Boba Fett lines in Empire Strikes Back Why didn’t we stone him?*Update*I realized later that he actually does have lines, just not that accent. There was just something so mindfucking about hearing Flight of the Concords coming out of Boba Fett’s head that [...]
Embracing the Dent
You may or may not know by now that I’m completely crazy – and if this is news to you then sit down my friend and let me explain. About 90 (or so) percent of the time I’m decently capable of keeping my “shit” together – but, the other 10 percent? Flippin’ nuts. One of [...]
Why being sick isn’t always so bad…
Suckers of Satan’s teets help Tracy wake up early in the morning
I’ve been waking up kind of unnaturally early lately and I’ve finally figured out why – God wanted me to see this and testify to its satanic powers of hate and stupidity. And now, thanks to the infinite and glorious powers of Tivo, I share it with you, my brothers and sisters. Behold the almighty [...]
Sugar-free Jello is my god now!
I’ve eaten more Sugar-free Jello in the past week than any sort of regular Jello in like my whole life – and what I’ve decided is this: horse hooves or no – it has become my own personal Southbeachized Ambrosia. I don’t mind skipping french fries or saying, “no thanks” when good friends offer me [...]
Can I help it if I smell bad, even when I’m clean?
Technically, it’s not next month yet, but if I had to look at that brown, turd of a masthead any longer – I would have puked all over the keyboard. I’m still not %100 satisfied – but, for now (it’s 1am) it will do. Woot. I hope you enjoy. Maybe now that I’m no longer [...]
On the edge
But, not for the reason you might think – the “diet” is going pretty fine actually – BUT!!! The second half of Prime Suspect 2 – Disc 2 WON’T PLAY! Buh buh buhhhht…?!?!?! Oh Netflix – please send a replacement soon. I may freak right out. I’m a woman without carbs, Netflix. Do what you [...]
Kill that fuckin’ bear – smash his brains – I don’t care – we’re livin’ in desperate times – so beware!
Today – I started the um, South Beach diet – eh hem…*COUGH* – again. Don’t laugh, assholes! I’ve got certain baby-shaped goals and for whatever reason my body does not want to make one for me. Tuesday I went to a fertility doctor and she gave me two courses of action – 1. dose up [...]
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